A close relationship is not something that happens overnight, it is something that takes time to build. However, it is important to approach the relationship on the child's terms and build trust. Many parents feel that their teenagers shut them out of their lives, as if they are no longer needed. As a parent, you are just as important as to them when they are a teenager as you were when they were younger.
In order to get your child to listen to you properly, it's important that they understand you. Explain how you experience things, how it feels to be a parent and what you're worried about. This also means being clear and communicating boundaries so that the child is aware of them.
The foundation of a close and healthy relationship often lies in the habit of discussing various things - from how the school day went to your child's favourite interests. Talking about anything that shows you, as a parent, are interested is a step towards ensuring an open and trusting line of communication. This then makes a more natural path to talking about nicotine, vaping, or other sensitive topics.
It's important that your child understands that you're there no matter what happens – they need to feel that they can be honest without facing anger and criticism.
Even if your child shares something that may be difficult to hear as a parent, try to show appreciation for their willingness to share. This increases the chances that your child will share things in the future as well. Try to be calm and clear so that your child knows you care and keep the line of communication open going forward.
Show that you care about your child's thoughts by sharing your own experiences. You do not need to share too much detail, but opening the line of communication by sharing your own experiences is a way of showing your child that you understand them.